Salinas man gets 3½ years for faking distress signals and a whopping $100k fine/restitution for the wasted efforts of the Coast Guard to rescue this idiot.
Kurtis Thorstad just wants some attention, this is the second time he's called in a distress signal (actually a whole series of them). He was convicted of doing this exact same thing in 2004 as well. He's either an idiot, a lonely idiot or got dropped on his head as a child and can't process rational thoughts properly anymore.
No matter, he'll have a few years in the pokey to reconsider his stupid hobby. I bet he'd like to call for help from the pokey but he's the old man who cried wolf and nobody gives a damn anymore.
Rule #314 is Don't Cry Wolf to the Coast Guard
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