#446 Don't Attempt To Goldplate Your Nuts or People Will Think You're Nuts

L.A. Gang Member Gold Plate’s Own Genitals To Death because really, who could refuse a guy with gold-plated balls?

Guessing the multiple facial tattoos and that sweet COMPTON where his mustache might go are strong indicators of this guy's utter lack of intellect.

Rather tellingly, this is the third case in recent years of idiots offing themselves while trying to gold plate their nut sacks. The doctor on the story notes that gold plating's one's balls is a medical impossibility. But don't let that stop the morons, nope!

Rule #446 is Don't Attempt To Goldplate Your Nuts or People Will Think You're Nuts

Update: Apparently nobody is this stupid. Snopes says the story is false.

#354 Don't Cheer Your Daughter On in a Gang Fight

Mother of the Year!

Cops and Courts, Sept. 19, 2011: Mom cheered on daughter in gang fight, police say

Maribel Ibarra Rivas is today's winner of the How To Be a Terrible Parent Award! Her prize is going to be some jail time, hopefully the loss of her children and a powerful whack upside the head with some common sense.

This mother is 41 years old but was there to cheer her daughter on in a gang fight while yelling gang slogans. She is then seen pulling her daughter off the other girl as if she's a concerned parent or something.

I hope getting arrested and outed for being an atrociously terrible parent, spending the weekend in jail on $25,000 bail and, hopefully, doing some jail time for inciting gang violence was worth it, Maribel.

And please, please, please, no more children for you. You've already demonstrated an appalling lack of ability to care for the one's have already made.

Rule #354 is Don't Cheer Your Daughter On in a Gang Fight

Update: The mom of the year candidate is now facing deportation.

2nd Update: She has avoided deportation but this fine parent did get a 120 day vacation courtesy of the county. I find it rather curious that her family and friends quoted say that she is anti-gang and tells her kids to stay clear of them. And yet she shouted gang names during the fight? Methinks they also think her poo smells like flowers too.

#271 Don't Coddle Scum

Suspected gang member arrested with gun a day after he was sentenced to jail for gang fight in which someone got stabbed and badly beaten.

And this kid was out looking for trouble the day after his sentencing to a slap on the wrist 180 day work furlough.

Gang bangers need to get sent to prison whenever possible and deported if at all possible. Get rid of the scum, clean up the streets and quit coddling these punks because IT ISN'T WORKING.

Rule #271 is Don't Coddle Scum

#107 Don't Use Your Car Like a Weapon

Pregnant Woman Killed in LA Brawl by a rival ramming into her with her car.

The oddest thing about this assault is that there was a preplanned fight between two large groups of women. And one of the fighters appears to have been a woman who was 8 months pregnant. And that, my friends, is pretty damned messed up.

Of course, she didn't expect to be run over but still, you're fighting with a late term baby in your belly? I guess stupid is as stupid does.

Rule #107 is Don't Use Your Car Like a Weapon